Teething Troubles!! – The Dentist and I

Image Credit: Deposit Photos

You know, I have beautiful pearl-like teeth arranged in the most perfect order.  Well, that’s a lie. My upper teeth look like the slanting tile roof of a village hut with a 45 degree tilt. But on the brighter side no girl ever ditched me for my imperfect teeth. So I didn’t bother to correct the tilt, but recently I thought I could at least do with a little bit of extra whitening.

Image Credit: Deposit Photos

Image Credit: Deposit Photos

When I visited my hometown last week, I went to a hospital to get my teeth ‘happy dented’.  Since it was also a dental college I was quickly put up for display with my mouth kept wide open using a small wedge-like thing. Beautiful girls – all from Kerala, came in line to take a look. Needless to say, I was embarrassed and felt like a naked man lying in the middle of a football stadium.

After the initial exhibition, a fat woman came into the room. She called in three girls. One girl was assigned the job of cleaning my upper teeth and my lower teeth were bequeathed to the second one. The third one was asked to supervise. In the process of cleaning, the supervisor girl found out that my gums weren’t healthy. She asked me to do an X-ray. She took my hand and guided me to the X-ray room. There I had to bite an iron rod and stand in front of a monitor with my chin rested on a platform. For one moment I thought they were going to give me an electric shock, well, they didn’t, but the girl did give me a shock me when she said, “I want to talk to you personally, can you give me your mobile number?”

She was a stunningly beautiful girl with a glint in her eyes. When a good-looking girl asks for your mobile number, no man in this world would want to say ‘no’. The X-ray machine was switched on and a light went across my face from the left side to the right and back to left, but the light inside my head was already in full glow!!

After the X-ray I gave her my mobile number which she quickly and secretly keyed into her phone and saved. Should I ask her mobile number? I wondered, but then I decided not to, because the girl looked like she was dying to talk to me personally so she would anyway call.

The result of the X-ray was bad according to her. But she asked me not to discuss this with her teacher – the fat woman. I agreed, though everything seemed a bit fishy. I did away with my cleaning and came out of the building. The girl came running after me and asked me to stop. She said, “Your teeth are sparkling now” and smiled, “I’m Soumya, I will give you a call in the night, would that be okay?”

“Why not, call me anytime” I said.

At night around 7 pm, the girl called. My heart raced in excitement.

“Joshi…” She spoke in the sweetest voice I have ever heard. “How’s your teeth now?”

“It’s sparkling…like you said” I replied.

She giggled. “When are you going to Bangalore?”

“Tomorrow…” I said

“Oh… Hmmm.” She paused

“When will you be back?”

“April – for Easter Sunday”

“April?…can you come back soon…please, please…” She pleaded like a child. I liked her tone. Sweet girl… I was in seventh heaven, or at least at the door of the heaven.

“When do you want me to come?”

“Next month?”

“I will try…”

“Please help me, I’m doing a project for my final semester. I was looking for a patient with a unique dental condition. Your dental X-ray shows that your gums are already spoiled. This usually happens in very old patients, so you are a unique case. Please come next month…please…”

At this moment, my wife called from the kitchen, “hey, sparkling teeth, your daughter wants to use the toilet, please take her”

I guess I don’t need to write how I felt; it’s easy for you to imagine.


P.S: I’d very much appreciate it if you could leave a comment if you really enjoyed reading it. Thank You.

About Joshi Mukard (100 Articles)
The author is a wandering soul with no place to call 'home-town'. He was born in Kerala, brought up in several parts of Tamil Nadu, and currently living in Bangalore, shifting his base across the city on a yearly basis with fellow (unfortunate) wanderers, his wife (Libena) and little daughter (Tanaya). Despite all these, the author is a happy soul with no complaints on anything. He wakes up in the morning and sleeps at night and in-between he ducks, stumbles and dances through this world.

18 Comments on Teething Troubles!! – The Dentist and I

  1. A. M Anil Kumar // February 14, 2013 at 7:21 am // Reply

    Good piece laced with humour. The climax was gr8, for the readers, although it might have been a heart break for you, personally. ha ha ha……

  2. Lol! Now that must have been a kick in the sparkling teeth but you still have the sense of humor to laugh at it 🙂

  3. Appo nalla ettinte pani kitti 🙂 🙂

  4. haha.. haven’t noticed your 45 deg slanting roof tile till now..

  5. I am sure you scrubbed the toilet sparkling clean in a fit! That was Express Humour!
    Incidentally, I too am a trainee dentist’s delight, thanks to a disastrous orthodontic invasion abandoned before climax by two warring ‘experts’.

  6. LOL 🙂 The climax was great 🙂

  7. Its really nice and I was expecting the same closure and finally you wrote what I expected

  8. Joshi! Its been so long that I have been to your blog… Just realised it when I came here today… Anyways I have caught up with ur writing and you are still the same funny man you have always been! Keep up the good writing :)!

  9. it reminds me of the grey’s anatomy episode !!

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